wHy yOu GoTta bE sO ME(an)?

Taylor Swift

"Mean"

Hey All--

OMG! My daughter and I were at the Taylor Swift concert in Saint Paul, MN last year--her first concert and my first in a super long time! It was amazing and overwhelming . . . and Taylor Swift is adorable and real.

I was so impressed and surprised when she began talking about bullying and mean kids. She spoke about her own experience of being a victim of mean kids when she was a youth, and she said that the most important thing we can take away from these experiences is to make sure that we never, EVER make anyone else feel small and pathetic the way these mean kids made us feel. That was the takeaway.

Chloe and I wept and held each other while she sang the song, "Mean."

Hmnnnn . . . made me so grateful that someone as famous as Taylor Swift had an enduring message for my impressionable, precious baby girl (okay, she's in 6th grade now but WHAT-EVAH!).

Sometimes, we keep mean friends around, even when we are uncomfortable--we give too much, we are criticized or told what to do, or we just can't be ourselves. Often, we even hang on just because we are afraid of being alone, or we just get used to people treating us in a mean or cruel way (happens with grownups, too).

Someone is better than no one, right? No. 

If we are mean to ourselves, and pay close attention to and listen to our inner mean girl, why shouldn't others be treat us in the same way, as well? Like I wrote about yesterday, we attract or draw into our lives people who reflect or mirror how we treat ourselves.

We need courage to let go of those relationships and form a better relationship with ourselves--one based on self-respect, honor, and love . . . for ourselves. That means letting go of the ones that no longer serve us in a positive, nurturing, constructive and loving way.

And guess what? 

Then we create room and open up space for other relationships to arrive that better meet our needs and are a better fit!

In school, just like in the Taylor Swift song, I used to wonder why other girls were so mean to me; I believed the rotten stuff they said about me, and I never stuck up for myself or argued with them (btw, I think I made up a lot of this dRaMA up in my own head!).

This kept happening over and over again. 

Hmmmmnnnnnn...

Have you ever noticed that the SAME stuff keeps showing up in your life until you learn your lesson ?!!!!?

Funny how that works! Thanks You-niverse!

It doesn't matter whether the friends are girls or boys--people treat us the way we allow ourselves to be treated (same when you are grown up!...)! 

So, if you notice that you are surrounded with meanies who aren't very nice to you, ask yourself "Why?" 

Maybe they aren't members of your tribe, after all! LET THEM GO AND LOVE YOURSELF, and then find and attract people who are a reflection of how (amazing) you feel about (amazing)you!

Love ME & U,
;) dana