Saturday, April 18, 2015

serV(i)ce . . .

"I hEaRt sErvIcE"
Hey All!
Here're 10 ways to serve others that are all super duper easy and require almost nO-tHing!
  1. give everyone you encounter a genuine smile . . .
  2. do a random act of kiNdness-it feels amazing!
  3. write someone you knOw a LOVe lettEr!
  4. pUt a stIckEr on Ur forEhEaD!
  5. buy the person behind you in in line their cofFee!
  6. gIve someonE a wonderful, genuine cOmpLImenT!
  7. sHare Your icE cReAm!
  8. gIve yoUr friEnd a frUit sNacK!
  9. aLLow someone to pass u in traffIc without getting aLL EMO  (send them LovE!)
  10. randomly dAncE in Public . . . just 'cuz!
How do you serve? Leave me a comment and let me know!

Super Duper Love STuff!
Dana

Friday, April 17, 2015

fun & free 2 feeL it aLL . . . (part 4)

AmAzING nAturE!
DeAr funfreePps!

After a couple of weeks of going through some tough emotions, I have been blogging a bit about feelings. Earlier this week I shared a vid from TheChopraWell describing 7 steps we can take to get rid of gross, unpleasant, toxic feelings. Here's a RaInBoW recap of the steps from the vid:  
  1. Take responsibility for your present emotions
  2. Witness what you are feeling
  3. Label your feelings
  4. Express your feelings
  5. Share your feelings with someone you trust
  6. Release toxic emotions through a ritual
  7. Celebrate the release of the feelings

The past couple of days, I shared some thoughts about the first 5 steps (see the earlier blog for my experiences & take on them!). So, today, I'll give some feedback on steps 6, & 7--these are the ones I believe we often forget. Here goes: 

6. Release toxic emotions through a ritual: this helps us let go and move on. How many of us hold onto past pain and resentment 'cuz it helps up feel better thanright (and THEY'RE wrong), stuck, a victim, or paralyzed. If we don't release our feelings, it only hurts us. I personally love doing rituals, and I'll blog more about some ideas tomorrow. . .

7. Celebrate the release of the feelings: This is kind of a continuation of the ritual, but in a more positive, grateful, "I'm gonna move on" type of way. It is also a way to honor and claim your emotional process, forgive yourself and others, and give yourself a hug &  

A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE!

So, after watching this video, I am thinking that what I have left off the process of feeling my feelings has to do with the last 2 steps Chopra describes: the release ritual & the celebration of release--maybe nOt taking care of these last 2 steps is what left me with the
                                  OvER
                           hAng 
 of left over emotion. Since they both have to do with rituals (and I am ALL ABOUT the RiTuALs), I can't wait to write some more thoughts about that tomorrow--
So grateful to be growing with you!

LotS & lOts of LuV!
:o) dana

Thursday, April 16, 2015

feEL iT 2 B fRee . . . (part 3)

it'll aLL mAke SeNse sOOn . . . 

wELL heLLo tHeRe!
Earlier in the week, the video from TheChopraWell (click on it if you haven't already watched it!) gave us 7 things to do to get rid of crappy overwhelm-ish gross feelings. The steps are:  
  1. Take responsibility for your present emotions
  2. Witness what you are feeling
  3. Label your feelings
  4. Express your feelings
  5. Share your feelings with someone you trust
  6. Release toxic emotions through a ritual
  7. Celebrate the release of the feelings
Yesterday I gave my translation of the first 3 steps. Here's my take on the 4th and 5th steps:

4. Express your feelings: this step can be done with a chum or alone (I used to rip phone books, scream into a pillow, or hit a punching bag when I was mad, for example). A friend of mine also used to do PUSH UPS, and YELL in his car! When I was sad, I used to throw myself on the floor and weep (especially after my dad and later, my brother, died) or crawl into a ball of bawling or a hEaP of tears :( . . . Sometimes pets or stuffed animals can be awesome listeners ('cuz they lick or sop up your tears!) and they won't tell you what to do or give you advice. If you don't have a person to talk to, a diary or journal will do. Prayers to the Universe or maybe to a Higher Power (whatever yours may be!) are also a great idea . . . as a matter of fact, some of my most enlightening conversations over the years have been with God . . .

5. Share your feelings with someone you trustthis is important 'cuz then we don't feel so alone. I have been known in the past to share feelings in hopes of manipulating others into feeling sorry for me or taking care of me--nOt PoWeRfUL & NoT a GoOd ideA (we really have to learn self-care around healing our emotional states)-- or even worse, I have shared my feelings with someone who was toxic and made me feel worse. It's bad enough that I shame myself, Or, they argue with me for how I feel or tell me not to feel that way . . . P.S. one of my besties told me that it really helps to ask your friend to just listen and let you vent without trying to solve it--that way s/he knows what they're geting into and what's expected!

Whew! We're almost through to the last step. Secretly, I realized that the reason I have still felt a bit crapp-ish is that I didn't really finish the last two steps--super important for letting go of the yucky stuff with 
aBsOluTeLy nO tUrNinG bAcK!
Tomorrow, we'll check out the last two, and I'll figure out a release ritual and celebration! Wooooooooo Hoooooooooo! cAn'T wAiT!

tOOdlEs & tOOtS!
;0) dAnA

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

FeeL it . . . fREE iT . . . (part 2)

We all have feelings . . .
What do we do with them?



"Resisting and avoiding pain sucks energy—and time...
The more you let yourself feel those minute-and-a-half hells, 
the quicker you’ll start feeling those minute-and-a-half happinesses."
—  Leigh Newman
Well HeLLo There All!

Got feelings? Yeah, you do . . . Yesterday, I shared a vid from TheChopraWell that described 7 steps we can take to release overwhelmingly toxic feelings. Here's a RaInBoW recap of the steps from the vid:  
  1. Take responsibility for your present emotions
  2. Witness what you are feeling
  3. Label your feelings
  4. Express your feelings
  5. Share your feelings with someone you trust
  6. Release toxic emotions through a ritual
  7. Celebrate the release of the feelings
So, looking a these steps, I am going to give y'all (Ken-tucky) my own interpretation--today, steps 1-3, and then tomorrow, 4 & 5, and I'll end with steps 6, & 7 . . . :0) So, after each of the steps in bLaCK, I added some thoughts and examples from my own life in bLuE:

Spiritual Solutions: Extreme Emotions
  1. Take responsibility for your present emotions: Good reminder! Hmmmn . . . I don't know about you, but I know that I used to be in the habit of BLAMING others (vIcTim) for my emotional state instead of taking ownership of how I feel . . . When we stay in victim mode, we can't take action! (WhEW! pOwER is mine! bwah-hahaha)
  2. Witness what you are feeling: I believe this is about noticing that something emotional is coming up, and just letting it be, or watching it without judgement. The challenge here for me has either been stuffing my feelings back down, ignoring them altogether, or pretending everything is, well, peachy! It also means NO judging yourself for feeling stuff--another challenge for me. Seriously, it's bad enough being sad without also being pissed off at yourself 4 being sad (note: gross layer of judgement . . . EeEw! I feel polluted!)
  3. Label your feelings: like, as in, calling them out as--anger, sadness, fear, loneliness--whatever words work 4 you. NOTE: I used to feel so unpowerful (made up word) that I got really sad and cried when I was actually super mad. Sometimes, anger, and even rage can let us know that our boundaries are not intact--or, in my case--NOT EVEN THERE (p.s. what are boundaries, you may ask? more later!).
SO there are the first 3 steps. I actually think I did these 3 pretty well in the past week . . . the next two? Hmmn . . . not so go(o)D . . . but still my best . . . at the time!
What do you think about these steps? Which ones are hard 4 u? Leave me a comment and let me know!

LoL--
;o\ siLLy mE (in a GoOD waY . . .)

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

fEeL iT . . . tHeN sEt iT fReE . . .


Spiritual Solutions: Extreme Emotions
TheChopraWell

“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. 
Conscious breathing is my anchor.”
You may already know that lately, I've been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster. One of the things that's tough about it, is not resisting the fact that I am on this roller coaster called LIFE.
First, a wave of
overwhelm, fear, & sadness
kind of takes me over;
and soon after that, I feel pretty
anxious & panicky
for a time.
To be honest,
feeling stuff
has not been something I have been
very good at in my life.

What is difficult for me is to move into my feelings to go through them, express them, and release them. I suppose I try to suck them up and go around, or deny them and try to get stronger. This process actually makes me literally sick. As Rilke notes,


Let everything happen to you,
Beauty and terror.
Just keep going,
No feeling is final.
~ Rainer Marie Rilke

I suppose that when I deny feelings, it makes them STRONGER, because in resisting, the energy gets more dense in its frequency. I get scared that I will get sucked in and never come out the other side--I will forever become the feeling of fear, sadness, or overwhelm. 
The video above from the Chopra Center is about how to feel and release extreme emotions. CHeCk iT oUtHere's a recap of the steps in BLaCk:
  1. Take responsibility for your present emotions
  2. Witness what you are feeling
  3. Label your feelings
  4. Express your feelings
  5. Share your feelings with someone you trust
  6. Release toxic emotions through a ritual
  7. Celebrate the release of the feelings
I personally love when stuff is laid out in steps, and looking at these, I feel like the most challenging ones for me have been---ALL OF THEM! but especially 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, & 7. Taking care of our emotional lives is just as important as our nutritional needs and our physical bodies; without the dark, we would not realize there was light. And we certainly cannot get on the "other side" of our feelings without moving through; going around just brings us back to where we started.

LotS of hUgs!
Dana